time to give up? chapter two

The cold wind ripped through me like ice. He noticed immediately, taking off his coat, and shrugging it over me. I looked up at him, since he was way taller than me, a question on my lips. He looked down at me suddenly, “just ask.” He said to me.
“What if I have a lot?” I asked him.
He laughed aloud. “You can ask me whatever you like.” He told me looking into my eyes.
“Well, for starters your name would be helpful.”
“ohhhh, right. How stupid of me to forget of something so important. My apologizes, I’m Shane, my dear Alyssa.”
I stopped on the sidewalk immediately, making him turn to me. He looked at me for an instant then, realized his mistake. “Look, I’ve known you for a while, so I took an interest in you, and…” he trailed off for a second. “ If you want the whole truth it has to wait till, after you make your choice.”
“Shane. I’ve made my choice. I don’t want to live on the streets I want to live with you if it’s okay.” I told him. I didn’t know what made me want to trust him, or put my life in his hands, I just felt like if I was to part from him I would get hurt so bad.
He laughed aloud, and then surprised me, by taking my body into his arms, and swinging me around. “Alyssa, of course I don’t mind. I invited you, remember? You will always be welcome in my house. Do you want to go home to eat, or out somewhere?” he asked, still holding my frail body in his strong arms.
“If it’s alright I would like to go to your home.”
“We can, and it’s your home now too.” He told me, bringing his mouth upon mine. Making my mouth burst in flames, as his lips moved with mine, making it feel like magic. He pulled away, breathlessly. “You have no clue how long I’ve been wanting to do that to you.” He said confusing me, while still holding me against his body.
“What?” I asked in disbelief.
“Shhh.” He told me. “I’ll explain everything tomorrow, right now just sleep, you need it.”
“But, we aren’t even at your house yet?”
He swung me up in his arms bridle style, and told me in a calm voice, “Now, can you sleep?”
“Yes, don’t leave.” I told him relaxing in his arms, with my eyelids jut about to drop.
“Don’t worry I never will.” Was the last thing I heard, as my eyes closed in contentment for the first time in a long time.

My eyelids felt heavy as I opened them slowly, to be met with sunshine streaming through blinds right beside me. I looked around to see myself in a queen bed, with a black and white bedspread that spun together in spirals, letting me get lost in the vortex. My eyes wandered around the rest of the room, where I found the room I had always dreamed of. First off, it was huge, and the theme was one I had dreamed of but never got the guts to make. I don’t have the patience to design a room, or even come up with a theme; it gets to confusing in my head. It was perfect.
It had a black swivel chair, that hung from the ceiling, by the window, and the window took up the whole side of the wall, letting me look out onto a field full of trees, grass, a pond, and horses. The other walls were amazing it had black and white photos every were, of cities, flowers, planes, and the most surprising, was the one of my whole family, me real family, in black white, blown up, and covering, one whole wall. I loved it. It was behind my bed but I could see all there faces, as they smiled at me. Tears fell down my face as I see me laughing, having an arm around Meghdi, and Mat, my sister smiling with Nazzi, and my parents hugging, while smiling warmly into the camera. Then my brother and his girl friend Jade on the side, kissing, with Ali behind them. My family, even though not all of them were blood, loving, caring, my rock, the people that never made me feel unwanted. All they did was love me, I miss them.
I stared at that picture for an hour remembering the good times, with my family, and the dinners we would share. I forced myself to look away, to look at everything else. It is amazing, with black and white walls, like my comforter, and a TV in front of my bed, and on my mahogany bedside table, stood a docking stand with my IPod, sitting in the cradle. “Yessss.” I screamed allowed. The thing I loved to depend on was back. I smiled as I stared all around room to see a set of Chester drawers, with a mirror above it matching my nightstand, and bed frame. That’s when I saw it.
A camera, to be specific, my sisters. I always wanted to get into photography, but I didn’t want to take that away from my sister, it was something for her to be proud of. I sighed in gratitude, and amazement, as I let myself fall back onto the most comfortable bed I had ever been on.
That’s when it occurred to me, ‘How would anyone know how to design my room that I hadn’t told anyone about, ever. And where am I? The last thing I remember is Shane telling me he would never leave, and he would never hurt me. I wonder if he’s telling the truth.’ I quickly pulled of my blanket, to see myself in the same clothes as last night. Thank god, it scared for a second. ‘How could I be so stupid? I basically delivered myself to him, and let him do whatever he wanted to me. I really am stupid.’ I thought to myself. If that ever happened to me again, I don’t know what I would do. Tears feel again as I remembered the first night, as the sun sank below the horizon I knew it was going to be bad.
My new dad was drunk, the first thing I heard that sent me on eggshells was, “Come here whore.” My stepdad yelled from the kitchen, I walked in, as he was taking off his belt.
“Hey, I hope you like your room. I thought it suited you.” Shane said, walking to my room, expelling me from those horrible thoughts of the past. His voice faded at the end, as he saw the tears coming from my eyes. I didn’t see him, I just felt his arms wrap around me, enfolding me in warmth and comfort, I put my arms around him, and buried my head in his chest, just letting it all out. He didn’t say anything, just held me. I was thankful. At this moment I didn’t care who he was I just wanted to feel safe, just for a little a while.
After a few minutes, I gained control, and slowly unwrapped myself of his arms, pulling back, and leaning on the headboard. “Sorry you had to see that. I didn’t mean for you to.” I told him softly.
“I told you, I will be here for you, no matter what. If you need someone to depend on I’m here.” He told me in just as quiet voice moving slowly to lean beside me.
“Why do you care for me?” I asked him slowly.
“If I told you, would you believe me?”
“I believe a lot things, and the fact that I haven’t woken up from this dream, is a good sign. After all your dreams that you sent to me I will believe anything.” I told him truthfully.
He smiled slightly, and started to slowly, tell me the truth. “This isn’t a dream, I promise. I don’t know how to prove it. I will tell you that your step dad will never touch again. You won’t have to see him ever again, I guarantee it. You don’t have to be scared; I won’t hurt you, like he did…”
“Shut-up! I don’t want to hear that you won’t do this or this; I just want to hear the truth, about why you care so much about me. A girl that lost her family, and had to go to a foster home, were everything that could go wrong did. Why would you want to help someone I an alley, where there about to end their lives, to go somewhere better. I just want an answer, not what you’re going or not going to do.” I spat at him angrily, in disbelief that he would bring any of my past up, he doesn’t even know me.
“Fine. You want an answer, I’ll give you one. I love you.” He paused for a moment to read my face, which was in total disbelief. I had never been loved this way. I was shocked. “Ever since I saw you being born in Texas, I knew it. You were beautiful, and you fought so hard just to stay alive, I knew that you were always going to be a fighter and that every once a while you would crash, and hit rock bottom, but you would make it through. You’ve made it through once now, I know you can make it one more time, but I need to know can you trust me?”
I looked at him in total disbelief, how could you have known about my birth or depression; before my parents were killed, and how could he even remember anything like that, at that age. “How did you know about me? How do you remember all the way back to my birth, and how do you know about my depression?” I asked him, stuttering through it.
He looked at me, sadness covering his eyes. “Don’t run. I promise I won’t hurt you.” If I wasn’t on edge before, I now was. “I am a vampire, and I saw you that day, because my best friend was killed,



and yes, he was a human. Ever since that day, I’ve been following you to make sure you were safe.”
“Is that how you went into my dreams?” He shook his head yes. “You followed me to make sure I was safe?” he shook his head yes, again. “When was I ever safe this past year? How?” my voice kept rising, until it was in a shout. “When that bastard beat me those nights, and left me on the floor to bleed to death, or was it when he …” My voice stopped, I couldn’t say it allowed, I would get whipped even worse if I ever saw him again.
“I’m sorry Alyssa, I would’ve got you out of there faster, but I ran into some complications. What did he do? I wasn’t here. I was busy.” He told me, staring at a wall.
“I’ll give you a deal; I’ll tell you if you tell me what you were doing.” I told him, I wasn’t just going to plain out tell him, I had to get something in return.
“I can’t tell you. It would break the rules.” He told me still staring at the wall.
“Well then I can’t tell you.” I said simply. He shook his head in understanding.
He looked at the wall for a second, regaining his poseur I guessed, “Why don’t I show you the rest of the house. I think you will like it.” He said standing up. He took my hand pulling me to my feet, sending my flailing body into his rock hard chest. My head just met his chest.
“Can I clean up first?” I asked him, still slightly scared for some reason, maybe it was that he was a vampire, or could it be that I’m falling for him, way to fast. The last time I was in a relationship I got hurt.
“Of course, and Alyssa there’s nothing to be scared of I promise.” He told me, pulling me into a warm hug. I leaned against him for support, trying to keep my composure. How did he know? How did he read my mind?
“How?” I whispered to him.
“Well, every vampire is born with something special, mine was mind reading. I can choose to read minds, or not, your expression was too much for me, I had to” He laughed aloud. I smiled a little, but hated that he could read my mind, that would mean that he could know.
“Please don’t anymore, I like my space.” I told him,
“Okay, and no, I haven’t read it before, well I did once right after the fire, but all I got was blabbering of nothing. The bathroom is through the door beside your bed, take as long as you need. There are clothes in a closet in there; I think I got your sizes, and style right. I will wait in here.” He said to me sitting down on the bed, looking at me expectantly to go. I turned my back, and rushed into the bathroom, to find a bathroom that I loved even more then my room.
I knew that the bathroom was going to be my sanctuary, along with my room. The bathroom was like an ocean, with blues mixing all around me, letting me get lost in a sea of light, and then my favorite part of the wall, a sun, painted showering me in warmth. Oranges, and reds mixed perfectly with the blue. I don’t know how he knew that my favorite place in the world was the beach, where all my worries would wash away. My eyes traveled around to find even more then I expected. I had thrones room, a steam shower, and a Jacuzzi full of jets. I squealed in excitement, and heard a quiet laugh from the other side of the door.
That’s when I noticed the dreaded wall. The thing that I’ve hated for a long time, a mirror, covering a whole wall of the bathroom. I looked at it in disgust, not for what it was, but what I saw. Standing before me was a 16 year old girl, with brown hair in mats atop my head, along with bones sticking out everywhere, showing my thinness off even more then what it should. Then the part that I hated the most the scars covering every inch of her body, baring her life story on her arms, legs, back, everywhere. That’s when I looked down at me, and saw that girl was me, not someone else. I wanted to see the girl from six months ago, the one going strong, and she was happy. I wanted to be happy again, but I knew that would never happen.
As soon as I thought about my past I turned around, and regretted ever looking at my reflection, or bringing up something that I can’t have again. I stripped out of my clothes quickly, a black shirt stained with my blood, and a pair of blue jeans two or three sizes to big for me. I threw them to a corner of the room, vowing to never look at them again. I immediately turned and ran to the shower, turning it on to be met with freezing cold water, I jumped a little but I was used to it. My body was freezing but it warmed up pretty quickly, making me start to relax even more. I washed my hair with a apple scented shampoo and conditioner. As the water ran down the my body washing away my past, or at least the physical part, the water was a mix of red and brown.
I don’t know how long I stayed in there; finally I left the warmth, and wrapped up in a big, comfy white towel. Walking into the closet I found everything that I love, from Hollister, to Rue 21. Everything that I would have worn the past six months was here. Everything came flooding back at me, all the memories of the past, and then the realization that the guy that took me in is a vampire, and I’m trusting him with my life. I’m going to die. I guess I lead a good life, and now there won’t be that much pain. My knees gave out from underneath me, sending me crashing to the fall. Everything crashed around me, avalanches piled onto my brain, full of memories of everything.

“Alyssa, Alyssa.” My mom called to me downstairs, forcing me to get up from typing to Mercedes on the computer. “Come down here real quick I have something to show you.” It axially sounded like she was happy about this thing, it must be something good. I raced down stairs, to find my mom with my dad leaning against the counter smiles plastered on their faces. “Alyssa,” my mom starts slowly. “We have a surprise for you.” I wait with round eyes, when my dad reaches into his back pocket revealing an envelope with the insignia of British Airways, airline service to take me across the ocean blue I hoped. I screamed jumping up and down with excitement, “Alyssa, we have agreed to let you go to Europe, and England on a few requirements. They are…” I stopped listening to my mom all I heard was, I was going to England.
I screamed in excitement till I heard the man of nightmares come in, “Hello whore, where is my dinner. I’m hungry.” My so called foster dad asked me, or told me realistically. I set about doing his dinner, thinking ‘How can I go from my parents telling me the good news to be about to be beat.’ All of sudden I felt a sharp pain to my cheek, and another, and another. I fell to the floor, but don’t remember how hard my body hit.
“Ahh.” I moaned as I sat up in my bed. My head hurt a lot, for some reason.
“You gave me quite a scare there you know.” A guy beside me said, I looked up at him, and that is when it all came back to me, Shane, a vampire was sitting beside me, ready to drink my blood and I axially let him take me to his home. Wow I am an idiot. Who does he think I am, some schoolgirl that will believe anything.
“Prove it.” I challenged.
“Fine, do you want to change first, or are you good in that?” He asked, as I looked down at myself, in soccer shorts, and a shirt. “I would recommend something warmer, it is a tad bit cold out, and I’m sorry that I had to change you, but I promise I didn’t look.” He told me, and then under his breath, “That much.”
“okay, give me a minute.” I told him, getting up off the bed, and racing to the bathroom. Entering the closet, I closed the door, and forced myself to think of something else, and not of my past. I thought of the fact, was he a real vampire? They don’t exist, right? I kept thinking about this as I went through the closet, and found a pair of blue jeans that were loose while not baggy perfect for me. Along with a blue long sleeve American Eagle shirt, one of my favorites, that I saw in the store a few weeks back.
I returned to my room to find him on the couch waiting for me. “Hey,” he said as I entered. “You still don’t believe me do you?”
“Nope.” I told him, standing a few feet away from him.
“Hmm, I guess I have to change that.” He said, with a grin on his face.
“What?” I asked as I felt his arms constrict around me, swinging me into his chest, and jumping out the window covering the whole wall. “Ahhh.” I screamed, burring my head into his warm chest. I felt his chest shake as he chuckled. As the air rushed around us, sending me into amazement, and a panic attack at the same time.